Driving with my 14-y-old, I see a luscious stand of multi-colored tulips surrounding a mailbox garden:"Oh, look at those tulips! Gorgeous. Oh, I want those! Tonight, will you come up here in the middle of the night and snip them for me?"
"Yeah, mom, I'll just drive up..."
"No, they'll hear you. Walk."
"Wearing all black. With a scissors."
"You better paint the scissor blades black, too."
"And I need something to put the flowers in. You can't just walk down the street in a ski mask carrying flowers."
"I have a dark red pillow case! It'll be the perfect crime. They won't know what happened. It's like a weird storm went through or something."
"I have a dark red pillow case! It'll be the perfect crime. They won't know what happened. It's like a weird storm went through or something."
"Yes! Steal the tulips for me! But. Oh. Wait. What if it's a little old lady's house?"
"She'll be so said when she comes out looking for her mail."
"Right, seeing her tulips makes her happy everyday. Her tulips are all that she sees that is full of life. They keep her going."
"But they are stolen. Gone, cut down to the dirt."
"In her shock and sorrow she has a heart attack, right there in front of her mailbox. Or she loses the will to live and just faints and dies. We can't take her tulips. Bad idea. DON'T steal the tulips for me!"
"Thinking ruins everything, mom. But, hey, what if we find out a creepy dude and his mean wife live there?"
"Yes, totally, that's fine. Yes, steal the tulips! But don't go there alone. Take your brother with you. And if you get caught, don't tell them about this conversation."
"What conversation?"
7 comments:
LOL! That sounds like conversations I have with my teenage boys! It's a way to check and make sure the little voice inside their head is working!
People always try and steal the prettiest things.
Why doesn't anyone drive by and try to steal my garbage?
Funny thing about tulips -- they seem to cause people to want to lift them. When my sister and I were very young we cut down a neighbor's tulips and brought them to our mother.
Thank God for situational ethics! Although maybe you shouldn't thank God for situational ethics.
Hmmm...A moral dilemma. Well, whatever will get you the most karma points I suppose.
What a terrifying post. I believe I had the exact same conversation with Moo about Freesias...
LMAO, my mum got really pissed off at me for stealing flowers from a cemetery when I was about 8.
What? Its not that bad :)
I'm sure we could whip up a good argument about the ethical conflict of thinking any one could truly OWN flowers, anyway. Right?
Mostly, my kids keep me honest. I don't know where they got it from.
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